Cool Cats WFH

My Hoomin Mom gave me material for today. Me, I‘m just hangin’ around in my indoor trees, because my outside playground is really really wet and the branches are blowing around so hard there is not one Feathered to be seen, even at the Feathereds’ Trough. Remi, pretending to have the Covids too So it’s good Mom gave me material, because like many many of you on the Interwebs these days, I have little worth saying. Mom says: If you know someone with the Covids in this Litter Pandemic who is not in the hospital, do not say these following sentences: Well, you’re lucky you got it now! Before the hospitals are overflowing! Did you get tested? What day? Have you been isolating since? Have you? Have you? You sound/look not so bad. Are you sure you’re sick? Yesterday you felt better. You must not be sick anymore. You’re probably imagining it. Everyone wants to have the Covids so they can feel A Part Of. Don’t come near me!  Take a shower. You’ll feel better. I’d drop off s

My Sister Cabbage After Watching CNN I‘m still here, fandom. It‘s my Hoomin Mom that was in a bit of a Hoomin Pickle. The Litter Pandemic is for real, and we are now sure it has to be related to litter pans. She is the only one who cleans it in this home, so it has to be, as my Hoomin Dad is doing A-Okay, other than closing the door to the room he stays in all day now and not letting me in. So back to the Hoomin Pickle. Two days ago, Mom had to go to the Vet. Dad wasn‘t let in and found that hard. I understand because no matter how many neighbors‘ doors I visit, and on most days it’s about 23, only two Hoomin Neighbors, Bob and Tracy, let me in. Two houses of all the ones on the street! Is that incredible? Hoomins can be so unsociable, and now with Great Orange Tabby Leader telling them to stay at least six cat-lengths apart, they are getting even more dodgy in the Outside World. Never particularly friendly cats, they have been getting downright Hissy. So now Mom is on the

Remi likes holiday wear which is stoopid Ever since I was a kitten, I have been tortured by the Canine my Hoomins unfortunately chose before they adopted me. Her name is Remi, aka RemDawg, and she is very impolite. Today’s picture is of her, but I want to show you another one that confirms how stoopid she really is compared to us cats. RemDawg gets to ride in the car which I do not RemDawg and I have, over time, learned how to get along, which basically means this scenario: I tiptoe around her, she ignores me. Other times, she pounces at me, or sniffs me in my private places, which are our not-getting-along moments. Sometimes I sneak her food. Shhhh! Anyway I tell you this because really, Speciez can get along if they try. On the subject of such sniffing, I have discovered some really good blogs and videos online for this Stressful Time for Pets caused by Indoor Hoomin Time. Stick with my storytelling style for a paragraph or so, and you will see where I am going with

My hoomin’s nest is pictured here. She had a few dicey days and nights, but her doctor told her to say home. As in don’t bother to come in unless you are mostly dead. Now she says she is well enough to shower. Hoomins do that. I can always lick, but there is one spot on my back I can’t reach. When I get a catlick from it, my Hoomin tries to brush it with this brush of nails that hurt me so badly I cannot stop from hissing. The only thing worse is when she comes after my claws with this steel knife clip thing and destroys my Pride. Here is what happened to my Hoomin in order of days if you think you might be suffering from Catvid19: Hotness like when you lie in the sun too long Running nostrils Coughing up hairballs only no hairballs come up Needing 12 naps instead of 8 Waking up earlier than usual and not wanting to knock objects off furniture Having no desire to claw furniture Lying on furniture longer than usual and in the same spot Fang ache Really bad feeling in

Me outside, on abandoned vehicle. BREAKING NEWS: CATS WILL GO HUNGRY Unless immediate action is taken It is time for an Immodest Proposal. Do not mistake this idea for proposing to your girlfriend during a time like the Litter Pan-Demic, which obviously would be stupid as well as immodest. Talk about PRESSURE. I also do not mean what Anonymouse suggested in A Modest Proposal many hundreds of years ago. I was in one of my earliest lives when Anonymouse recognized that many poor children and their cats were starving (it was actually worse for cats--you could see my ribs). Anonymouse came up with some really good solutions. For example, one was to fatten up little babies and then sell them at a meat market when they're one year old or so. The money would help out the parents with too many expenses like remodeling their little huts or putting money aside for their retirements, and also provide food for the other children and cats. The other children then could grow u

Once, Hoomins didn’t understand my pain ... To Governors of California, New York, and Illinois Can you guys give Governor Baker a call? He’s in Boston, on Bacon (the pork kind) Hill. I’m sure you can find his number. He’s an Elephant, and you’re all Donkeys. Clue him in anyway, even though he’s a different Speciez? Lockdown, my Hoomins say, is a learning opportunity. Hoomin Lockdown will show Hoomins what happens when they do this cruel thing to us. Note photo above, as I tried to escape my first summer living with Hoomins. No natural hunter gatherer should be confined like this! It’s INHOOMIN. The only way Hoomins will learn is through experiencing it themselves. They’re kinda … you know, slow. And Speciezist. To Foxy News You’re scaring me. You said it was all a hoax. Now you’re saying we’re all gonna die. Which is it? And can cats catch it? Dogs? Fish? Gimme it straight up. To the US Congress Why didn’t anyone clue me in regarding a chance to sell off my